Wednesday, November 06, 2013

GURLLL!!!! What Were You Thinking? Miss Belgium Noemi Happart and Miss Turks & Caicos Snwazna Adams try to smile while ending up in my "Oh Dear!" Miss Universe 2013 Preliminary Competition Evening Gown List--Crocus City Hall Moscow Russia
All Photos Courtesy of

Well, fellow Pageant Fanatics, in my last post HERE I've discussed my Top 20 BEST GOWNS from last night's 2013 Miss Universe Preliminary Competition so naturally, you know what comes next...THE "UH OH!!/Oh Dear!/What Was She Thinking?" List. Every time one of these girls came on stage, I yelled a loud "OOOOOHHHHHH!!!" and then smiled and remembered why I LOVE watching beauty pageants, especially the Miss Universe Preliminaries. So, let's get to reverse order from "Uh Oh" to "OH NO SHE DIDN'T" Worst, here's my "Top 13" List--Enjoy and I welcome any and all of your comments and thoughts of course!

First I want to start with my two BIGGEST GOWN DISAPPOINTMENTS...
Miss Dominican Republic Yaritza Reyes (left) and Miss Israel Yitaish Aynaw (right)--were two big disappointments for me, when it came to the evening gowns they wore at the 2013 Miss Universe Preliminary Competition. Yaritza and Yityish are two of the most beautiful contestants in the pageant and they succeeded in looking less-than outstanding...
Miss Dominican Republic's gown choice was dowdy and Mother-of-the-Bride unflattering and then THAT HAIRSTYLE!!! Whoever ill-advised her to do this should be fired!
And Miss Israel's gown choice wasn't bad but it was so bland, too tight on the hips and well, I expected SOOO much more from this Supermodel gorgeous beauty. At least from the neck up, she was PERFECTION!

And now the "Uh Oh!" Top 13:
No. 13 Miss Azerbaijan Aysel Manafova: Aysel wore this same gown for her Evening Gown Portraits on the Miss Universe website. I didn't like it then and I don't like now. It featured a strapless sequined bustier with (I think) attached panties and a see-though chiffon skirt section. Overall, it's tacky and something straight out of a Prom-&-Pageant shop.

No. 12 Miss Turkey Berrin Keklikler: In the photos above, the gown doesn't look so bad (she also wore the same gown for her Miss Universe website Evening Gown Portrait). But during the Preliminaries, you get to see that not only is this a white floaty chiffon gown also includes a sequined hot pants jumpsuit! Yes kids, those are crystal-encrusted booty shorts under all that. It's a HOT MESS. Someone needs to tell her that this is OK for a Eurovision/Las Vegas After Party, but not for "Miss Universe".

No. 11 Miss Bulgaria Veneta Krasteva: Veneta wore this same sparkly gown for the Evening Gown Portrait and I wasn't a fan.

She looks like Adrienne Maloof's (former cast member from "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills") twin sister! The gown is Vegas tacky, her hair is from 1988 and she just looks much older than she probably is.

No. 10 Miss Poland Paulina Krupinska: NOOOOOO Paulina! I told you I didn't like this dress when you wore it in the Miss Universe Website Evening gown Portraits. Why didn't you read my blog and wear something else? Paulina is supermodel gorgeous and I'm sure she'll still make it into the Top 15/16 but this gown is store bought, too short and garish in its color-and-sequins combination. This is cute for a "Sweet Sixteen" party but NOT for a world stage such as the Miss Universe Pageant.

No. 9 Miss Romania Roxana Andrei: Another contestant wearing the same tacky gown she wore in the Evening Gown Portraits. When will these girls ever learn? This gown looks too much like a National Costume and less like a gown one wears for Miss Universe. And imagine if an actress or TV personality wore this at an awards show/red carpet event? They would be INSTANTLY on the "NO!" section.

No. 8 Miss Turks & Caicos Snwazna Adams: On a positive note, I give her "At-a-Gurl!" points for being so bold as to actually wear an apple green chiffon strapless gown over matching poly-satin "cigarette"/Capri pants! And yes, kids, this a Gown-and-Capri pant combo. And that leads me to also put her in my "Uh Oh" list because...SHE IS WEARING A GOWN-&-CAPRI PANTS ensemble!! These girls have lost their style minds.

No. 7 Miss Austria Doris Hofmann: Doris is stunning--one of the prettiest contestants from Europe in fact. But this gown...It is a perfect example of the need for EDITING! The gown featured a white charmeuse satin strapless corset and fitted skirt, falling light blue chiffon pieces that came from the neckline of the bustier(?), oversized blue and silver sequins (on a positive note: the sequins looked expensive), and if that wasn't enough, a matching bejeweled neck-piece! Too Mucheey.

No. 6 Miss Aruba Stefanie Evangelista: I didn't like this gown that she also wore for her Evening Gown Portrait on the Miss Universe website. It is Scheherazade Belly Dancer-at-a-Questionable Bar-in-Marrakesh BAD! Another gown choice in need of serious editing; there's just TOO MUCHEEY going on.

No. 5 Miss Serbia Ana Vrcelj: When Miss Serbia came out in this white satin and chiffon gown , I thought "OK, this is not good", and then I focused on the ruffled "rosette" appliques on the hips and thought "Oh, this is really BAAAD!". Two questions: A) why would any designer place these tacky-looking things on a dress, and B) why place them on the hips? 

They look like those "Prize Ribbon things" one gives at dog shows...without the satin ribbon/tape.

No. 4 Miss Great Britain Amy Willerton: I was really looking forward to what Amy would be wearing for the Preliminary Evening Gown Competition. She's very beautiful, looks amazing in her "Glamour" photo and swimsuit and therefore, is one of the top favorites, but...this was an absolute MESS! Let me try and describe this crazy gown: it's a strapless SUPER Mermaid-shaped gown with ombre-like shadings of various lilac, purple and white colors in what looks like a bunch of hair scrunchies. I am all about DRAMA and I get that but, this was a DRAMA miss. And on top of everything, did she really need that diamante necklace and earrings??? Let me answer that: No!

No. 3 Miss Lithuania Simona Burbaite: I have two words: HEFTY BAG. I cannot believe she would wear a gown made of a fabrication that looks very much like a garbage bag. Why didn't a  (closeted) Russian Gay backstage working in the hair and makeup department didn't warn her, is beyond me.

No. 2 Miss Belgium Noemi Happart: Noemi's gown choice was so Tacky-licious and bad, that yes, she made it to "No. 2" in my "Oh No She Didn't!" List. This strapless golden colored gown featured a fitted bustier and multi-ruffled hi-lo "Can-Can" attached skirt. Under any circumstances, this is a NO. How anyone would see this on a hanger--or a sketch of it--and say "Oui! I want that!" makes me seriously question her taste level. And I didn't even begin to mention those super-tacky gold stacked pumps!

And My No. 1 "Oh No She Didn't!" Evening Gown form the 2013 Miss Universe Preliminaries Is...
Miss El Salvador Alba Delgado: There were so many contenders for the Top "Uh Oh!" Evening Gown Prize but when Miss El Salvador came out in this canary yellow chiffon and applique gown...and the camera gave a close-up on"Sistahs", I was like "Done and Done!"...Take a look at what I am talking about:

There are silver jeweled crystals ON HER NIPPLES!!! Seriously, what was Alba thinking?  When she picked this gown? Why didn't anyone tell her???!!! It drives me so LOCO, that yes, she deserves the Top Prize in the "Oh No You Didn't!" List for the 2013 Miss Universe Preliminary Evening Gown Competition.

So...what did you guys think? Any gowns in this group that you think shouldn't have been her? And why? I'd love to read your comments below!! Until then---stay tuned for my Post-Miss Universe 2013 Final Telecast Evening Gown Review this weekend!!!


Anissa said...

Actually I really like the purple/white dress that Miss Britain has. It's romantic, different, and still flatters her. The necklace is definitely too much, but overall I applaud her trying something new that's not tacky or overly prom.

Marsha said...

I think you are right-on as to these top worse gowns. I don't think these girls should have worn the see-through skirts -- they were definitely tacky. The yellow gown is the worst, of course; that was definitely a bad call to put the silver beading on the nipples. The only gown I can think of that may be "safe" is the purple ombre, it wasn't too bad.

Karla Rivas said...

hi..! Nick HOW ARE YOU PIENSO QUE EL VESTIDO DE MISS EL SALVADOR no fue el peor de la noche tenemos diseños como el azerbaijan,, belgica, Gran bretraña, y lithuania que son MAS feos que el de la señorita delgado parecen de carnaval o de una obra de teatro de cabaret o algo por el estilo Lo digo porque soy actriz y no parecen mucho esos diseños como el de SOUTH AFRICA y el de miss puerto rico me encantan, hay que aceptar que tuvo un desacierto con la parte de arriba de su vestido pero por lo demás creo que ha estado aceptable además hay que revisar su ajuar porque tengo entendido que lleva otros vestidos que hubieran visto de una manera mas aceptable

Karla Rivas said...

hi ..! Nick THINK HOW ARE YOU DRESS MISS EL SALVADOR it was the worst night we have designs like azerbaijan, belgium, Great bretraña, and lithuania are MORE ugly than the carnival seem slim lady or a work cabaret theater or something like that I say that because I'm an actress and did not seem much like those designs SOUTH AFRICA and miss Puerto Rico I love, we must accept that he had a mistake with the top of her dress but otherwise have been acceptable I think we must also review their trousseau because I have understood that takes other dresses they had seen in a more acceptable

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