That's A LOT of Gown!--Did Miss Universe Kazakhstan Make my Top 20 Worst Gown in a Beauty Pageant List? Maybe...
In my last "Sashes and Tiaras" post HERE, I blogged about my list of Top 25 Beauty Pageant Gowns of 2016--and early 2017-- since I had to include the most recent "Miss Universe" Pageant. So, now is the "UH OH Sister" of that list: My Top 20 "Oh No Huney! Gowns of 2016/early 2017". As always, there's always some not-so-good that come along with the FABULOUS...
Too Muchey and Too Tacky: Worst Gowns in an International Beauty Pageant 2016
These are gowns that pageant contestants--from "Miss Grand International 2016", "Miss Supranational 2016", "Miss USA 2016", "Binibining Pilipinas/Miss Universe Philippines 2016", "Miss Venezuela 2016", "Miss Universe 2016" and several others--left me wondering "What the Heck?"..."Do You Have a Pageant Glam Team/Best Gay friend?" and "What Were You Thinking?". I am sure that many of them may have had no other choice or might have been "ill-advised" to wear these styles but in any case, these were Beautiful Women Wearing the Wrong Gowns.
I have narrowed my list to 20 and here are the Worst Dressed Pageant Offenders:
Well, well, well, look what we have here. Monika wore this ivory tulle and lace applique gown that featured feathers (if the tulle and sequins and applique were not enough!). This is a big ol' mess. Plain and Pageant Simple. It's like a tacky stripper wanted to get married and she decided to wear this. She needs to give this to a thrift store in the Czech Republic. ASAP.
4. Miss Grand International Ethiopia Genet Tsegay: Oh No Genet! I just have one question: Did you look in a mirror before going out--or at least, when you chose this gown? Here's the thing--those bra cups/pads SHOULDN'T BE SHOWING. EVER. It's so tacky I don't even know where to start. I feel bad for her since she is quite pretty. The tacky-licious bra-pad exposing gown just ruined her.
5. Miss World Philippines Contestant No. 9 Jan Helen Villanueva: Two words: Oh Dear! OK, let me start with the good: I liked the bright canary yellow color of this gown and liked the semi-one-shoulder neckline but after that, it all went No-No. The gathering at the bust looks bulky, the sequin applique looks cheap--and also heavy. And then WHAT IS THAT IN FRONT OF HER CROTCH!? Who, in their right fashion design mind, would place a pointed sequin applique THERE? It's like a big sign saying "Hey! Take a look at my Cha-Cha!" Nope, I won't.
6. Miss Supranational Germany Anja-Vanessa Peter: I don't even know where to begin with Miss Supranational Germany and this gown. Maybe I'll start with the obvious: THAT "Peacock"-inspired sequined top! First of all, the fit is awkward; it's way too low and makes her look as if she has "Sagging Boob Syndrome". I also think it's a bit too "Showgirl/Las Vegas". And then (yes, there is more!), IT'S A SEQUINED LEOTARD/BODYSUIT...with an attached ivory double-front split skirt. There are so many things wrong with what I just typed, I am shaking! But God bless her, she is a trouper: Smiling through it all.
7. Miss Grand International Moldova Alina Staicu: I had to Google her and her age because, in this photo (and this Mother-of-the-Bride gown) she looked like she was 50. In case you are wondering, she is only 27 years-old. The whole look is a mess: Too much hair, too much makeup and too 1992-like tacky gown. Oh, and in case you might have missed it...check out her BLACK PLATFORM HEELS. Someone PLEASE give this girl a GAY Fashion-savvy Bestie. ASAP!
8. Miss Supranational Gibraltar Aisha Ben Yahya: When you combine Cha-Cha Drag Queen, Figure Skating Costume and "Folies Bergere", this is what you get. While it is super fun and she's probably a hoot at a party, this is just the kind of gown that will get people talking...but for the wrong reasons. #Gurl #YouAreNotAShowgirl
9. Miss Universe Canada Siera Bearchell: Miss Universe Canada wore this white mermaid-style gown for the Miss Universe 2016 Finals Evening Gown competition. In front of MILLIONS of viewers! The dress featured a fitted torso with sequins and applique, sweetheart neckline, nude illusion, full mermaid-style organza skirt section and (if that wasn't enough!), a neck piece. It was A LOT, overwhelming, kind of Tacky-licious and waaaaay too 1980s Pageant Betty. Compared to many of the "Miss Universe 2016" Semi-finalist's gowns, this was just unacceptable. On a good note, Siera's hair and makeup (accentuating those Elizabeth Taylor-like eyes!) was perfect!
10. Miss Supranational England Angelina Kali: While I give her points for "Sexy Drama", this white lace gown was Tacky Sexy--in a "Virgin Elvira" sort of way. First off, the fabrication looked like a doily. There were many things wrong with this: The style was just way too revealing; the side front slit, the side midriff cut-out, the shoulder...and then, she had a look of "How Mucheey?" that took it to another Tacky-licious level.
gorgeous contestant who made a wrong gown choice. When her name and state was called during the Evening Gown portion, I could not believe that she walked out in this golden-silver gathered gown mess. Why would she allow herself to be swallowed up in this concoction? And to add insult to style injury, the fit was awkward at best: It is high-waisted and therefore cutting her body off, it is too heavily ruched at the waist and front (it should have been FLAT with no ruching at the front), and the sequin top didn't help at all. I hope she gave this to Goodwill or Out of the Closet.
Hers was my favorite!--but she's not getting any trophies for this gown from me! This highlighter yellow nude organza, chiffon, sequined dress is just too tasteless and tacky. There's too much going on, too much "boob-age", too much of everything. It's like a gown the wife of a nouveau riche Russian Oligarch would pay thousands of dollars for because she thinks it "looks expensive". Nope, it looks TACKY.
13. Miss Carabobo 2016 at Miss Venezuela 2016, Frinddy Bocaranda: Oh Frinddy! What Mardi Gras Carnival float are you riding in with this get-up? This emerald green colored gown featured jeweled sequins down the front, an iridescent overlay, nude illusion bodice and naturally, if that wasn't enough, there was a tiered back overskirt. This was a Ticky-Tacky, Figure Skating Costume Meets Carnival Hot Mess. Ayyy Dios Mio! #Mija
15. Miss Supranational Guadeloupe Jenifer Geran: File under "Bless Your Heart". I am sure Miss Supranational Guadeloupe probably does not get the same amount of pageant funding a "Miss Venezuela" or "Miss Philippines" does. And so, I try and cut her some slack but...this iridescent gown is just Tacky-licious. It looks inexpensive and a bit "Happy Hands at Home"--like if her cousin or grandma made it. I used to excuse these things but, when you are competing in such an international pageant stage, these ladies need to bring it! At the very least: Read a Vogue Magazine or look at Vogue.com for Runway/Red Carpet Gown suggestions and see if anyone in that gorgeous island of hers can copy it! Otherwise, please don't even think about packing such a mess of a dress.
16. Miss Supranational Nigeria Adaeze Obasi: Not sure why anyone did not tell the lovely Adaeza that the inner dress of this gown was WAAAY too short. This could have been nice if the skirt didn't stop 1/4" below her CHA-CHA and if the inside wasn't pink and...well, I could just go on and on. This was "Housewives of (fill in the blank)" tacky.
18. Miss Distrito Capital 2016 at Miss Venezuela 2016, Yanett Margarita Diaz Dib: There were A LOT of Too Mucheee gowns at last year's "Miss Venezuela" and one could argue that maybe lots of them were a mess (I kinda liked some of them!), but I just couldn't even begin to explain the one above. The design was by Venezuelan couturier Raenrra and featured a pink and silver sequined column gown with heavily appliqued bodice and then, a very over-the-top multi-multi-MULTI ruffled and tiered back overskirt. That overskirt alone could be used as a major flotation device. And I can only imagine the hours upon hours of work to sew that. The gown itself wasn't so bad (OK, it was Showgirl tacky!), but in combination with the overskirt...she looked like a Drag Queen on a float in Rio in 1995. Really Too Mucheee.
19. Miss Connecticut USA Tiffany Teixeira: Tiffany is GORGEOUS and I really didn't have a problem with her red off-the-shoulder overskirt gown. She looked quite impacting and pretty. But then...my eyes panned down and all of a sudden I had the "Shower Scene from Psycho" music playing in my head: THOSE TACKY LUCITE STRIPPER HEELS!!!!!! She ruined the whole look with those darn shoes! Why do these girls do this to themselves? Two scenarios: 1) She just wants to look taller. (On Wikipedia, it says she's 5' 7" which means she's probably 5' 5") 2) These gown samples are normally made for 5'8" or taller and therefore instead of shortening the hem, they give her some SUPER high platform heels to fix that! Either way, there's really no excuse to wear these, unless you work at Spearmint Rhino Strip Club in LA.
20. Miss Universe Kazakhstan Darina Kulsitova: Yes, kids I watched the 65th Miss Universe Preliminaries and during the Evening Gown Competition, I almost spilled my wine when I saw this! Darina wore this bell-shaped ballgown featuring hundreds, if not thousands, of jeweled sequins as well as feathers at the bottom. If that wasn't enough, there was a crystal choker to finish it all off! She looked like the top of a Christmas tree. While I gave her points for making a statement...this was a totally tacky and overdone one.
**Hopefully this post helps any future Beauty Pageant contestants at International Beauty Pageants and what they SHOULD NOT WEAR! I'm trying to help one tacky beauty pageant contestant one blog post at a time :)